Happy 21st birthday to kAeJ! Kinda hard to believe that I am actually celebrating my 21st birthday today. I'm incredibly thankful to God that I'm still alive (although sometimes I wish I'm not) and surrounded by friends who truly cares. I said this last birthday and I'm going to say it again - Today, in itself is a miracle.

I find it quite funny when Huiling told me over dinner on Thursday, "You should start looking for a boyfriend. I won't object you know?" My cousins are telling me that I'm of legal age to get married without having to seek the approval of my parents. Ah, the joy of being 21. I can hear Freedom beckoning. Yet, with greater power comes greater responsiblity. Now is the time for me to take control of my own life, to be responsible for everything I do and say. That in itself is pretty daunting.

I've stepped into Adulthood and it's time to embark on another journey. I don't blame God for the things that are happening but I do wonder why it always has to happen. I count my blessings and I'm extremely thankful to God for surrounding me with friends who care and are always there to make me happy. But today has not been a good day and I feel like I'm going to burst into tears anytime. All the bitterness, all the unforgiveness, all the hatred, won't You just take it away?

Staring into the Abyss,